Word O'The Day: Bay Scallop
Function: noun
Date: 1943

Definitions:
(1) a scallop (Argopecten irradians) of United States coastal and estuarine waters of the Atlantic Ocean and the Gulf of Mexico that is harvested commercially for food
(2) the things Margene foolishly ordered from a restaurant called McGillicutty's in St. George that gave her code red food poisoning for the past four days
(3) The bane of Margene's existence; her nemesis from this point on¹

I have to say, first, that McGillicutty's isn't as cheesy a place as the name might suggest. It's not a regional version of a sit-down fast food place or anything like that...not that I'm above sit-down fast food anywhere, really...I'm just saying McGillicutty's is actually, like, a nice place...supposedly, at least...despite its cheesy name. It's expensive, I know that much. And it makes itself look fancy: they have black napkins they offer you if you're wearing darker clothing so the white napkin doesn't leave those tiny white balls of cotton on your threads. Impressive. But that'd be a lot more impressive if the food didn't make you yarf for almost a week. That might be a little harsh, I guess. No one else got sick and Bill ordered Antelope for God's sake. So, I guess I just got unlucky...which I can accept, but still reserve the right to be grumpy about it.

So I've been laid up in between "sessions," which is what I've been calling my stints in the bathroom. (Oh don't be so squeamish, Internet! We've all been there. No need to be shamed into silence. I like to keep you in the loop, and this is what it looks inside the loop. Admit it, you love it!) I've been drinking kiddy juice jam packed full of electrolytes (which, apparently, are my new best friends) like it's going out of style...by the gallon, it seems. That was Nicki's idea. She and Cara-Lynn have been so good to me.² Everyone's been great to l'il ol' me while I've been laid up, but those two have really put in their time. Bill was bringing me my daily piece of dry wheat toast early in the morning when he woke up (and he was always very sweet to me), but Nicki and Nicki 2.0 have done a lot of the heavy lifting. It's so impressive to witness Nicki turn on the caretaker switch that is so deeply built into her "being." Sounds pretty dramatic, I know, but it really is amazing. As you might expect, she's a firm caretaker...firm but fair, we'll say. If she's taking care of you while you're sick, she's in charge and there's just no way around it. You can fight it. You can say you don't want any more electrolyte goodness, but guess what: you're getting more electrolyte goodness because that's what you need and there's just not gonna be any arguing about it. I felt stupid even thinking about this because I knew I was gonna be OK eventually even if I was miserable all the time, but it was hard not to think of Nicki taking care of Barb when she was really sick. I've seen flashes of this in Nicki at times, for sure — it's remarkable how deeply she can care. But for some reason, the past few days have been really filled with that feeling. I'm really grateful. Everyone's nice and really helpful, but there's no doubt Nicki was leading the charge. It made me really special. Maybe, when I can actually eat real food again, I'll make her a dinner at home to thank her. No more McGillicutty's...that's for darn tootin'!

I know this short, but I'm gonna check back in in the next few days. Since it's been longer than usual since I posted, I'll be on double time once I can move around for more than 10 minutes without almost passing out. Promise! So, I'll talk to you soon. Wish me luck finally kicking this...

Me.

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¹I'm waiting to hear back from the Webster's people about my proposed additions to the definition of the entry "bay scallop" — noted here in italics. My hopes are high that they'll appreciate my passion on this issue and take my advice.
²I know a lot of "friends of the family" really want to know the deal with Nicki and CL. I know it'll grind your gears, but I'm not gonna go there. It's a really delicate thing. Nicki and her Ex are trying to work out a system and I'm sure it'll work out, but it just seems wrong to chitty-chat about it as it's happening. Soon enough, I'll break it down the best I can. But they deserve the time to figure it all out for themselves first. Obviously I'm involved in the discussions on the Henrickson end of things, but...I know it's annoying, but I feel like I should just keep my blogging mouth shut for the most part...for now. I don't wanna...disrupt the balance, we'll say. I hope y'all understand.