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After reading the thread, why would any one be attracted to Laura--the obvious question came to mind, why would see want Paul?
He is older, married, waffles, angry,come with tons of baggage. I have read other posters say it is because he would be a man that is hard to get. (A man like this is not much of a challenge, an easy target if that was her motivation.)
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Tina in Florida
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15
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3/5/08
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(11 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 11:35 PM
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> >> Why would Laura want Paul?
>
>
> Well, I think it's a safe bet that it is because she
> has "daddy issues," given the weird relationship with
> her dad, and the fact that, as a 15-yr old, she was
> sexually taken advantage of by a 40 yr old man -- so,
> her identity and self esteem are all tied up in how
> sexually desirable she is to an older man<
Laura has a father so I don't think this is a "daddy" issue. There is intimacy that is a part of therapy and I can honestly say I had a crush on my therapist when I was in my early 20's. I told him about it and then felt relieved. One he was married with three children and I would never ask a man with a family to have an affair with me. Two how comfortable can a therapist be with a patient who can report him on a whim and have him lose his license. It would be the affair from hell, I felt, with my therapist. Plus it would have ruined my therapy. But there is a difference between a crush and love. I think Paul loves Laura and if Kate has an ounce of sense she will work with him to save their marriage.
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15
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3/5/08
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(10 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 11:29 PM
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> After reading the thread, why would any one be
> attracted to Laura--the obvious question came to
> mind, why would see want Paul?
> He is older, married, waffles, angry,come with tons
> of baggage. I have read other posters say it is
> because he would be a man that is hard to get. (A man
> like this is not much of a challenge, an easy target
> if that was her motivation.)
>
> --
> Tina in Florida
<
Why wouldn't Laura want Paul? It may be based on erotic transferance but if you look at Paul's 25 year marriage his wife's initial attraction to him was his deep interest in her. It's a fantasy that therapists are perfect and don't have problems like everyone else. It's all how one deals with them. Laura and Pauls age difference is nothing they are both grown adults. My concern is that Laura is asking Paul to risk his livelyhood if he crosses the boundaries of therapist/patient. As a medical doctor she cannot cross those boundaries with any patient she see's in the hospital even if it is in the ER room. Laura has been in therapy with Paul for a full year when the show started. So we're missing a lot of information on how they arrived where they are today. I think in the end Paul will not cross the boundaries of his patient/therapist realtionship with Laura. He is too good of a therapist for that and he wouldn't have sought out Gina if he had made up his mind. I do think Paul is in love with Laura and she may truly love him and its sad. On another note, Kate, who has never explained how long her affair went on and shows no accountability for her actions is driving Paul away.
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Posts:
91
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2/17/08
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(9 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 10:56 PM
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> >> Why would Laura want Paul?
>
>
> Well, I think it's a safe bet that it is because she
> has "daddy issues," given the weird relationship with
> her dad, and the fact that, as a 15-yr old, she was
> sexually taken advantage of by a 40 yr old man -- so,
> her identity and self esteem are all tied up in how
> sexually desirable she is to an older man
I agree with you Michael. I think a lot of women get into therapy with very deep seated "daddy issues" (I know there's probably a more therapeutic term, but that's what it looks like to me too). Paul is probably smart enough to know that Laura's attraction to him is mostly transference..but he has really fallen hard for her anyway. These kind of women in therapy are the most likely to be abused by their therapists IMO if they are unlucky enough to cross paths with an unethical predatory one. Paul's kept his lust in check so far.
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Posts:
188
Registered:
2/28/08
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(8 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 10:17 PM
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>> Why would Laura want Paul?
Well, I think it's a safe bet that it is because she has "daddy issues," given the weird relationship with her dad, and the fact that, as a 15-yr old, she was sexually taken advantage of by a 40 yr old man -- so, her identity and self esteem are all tied up in how sexually desirable she is to an older man
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Posts:
630
Registered:
2/26/08
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(7 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 10:06 PM
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> LOVE, it is what it is, hard to define really! Love
> overlooks many things, like baggage, pot bellies and
> age. Paul has fallen in love with Laura, when he
> told Gina a few episodes ago, he explained how he
> loves the way she laughs and enjoys talking to her.
> These are examples of more than a lusting after
> r someone, this is love!
Quite so! Hot4Gabe, you underscore how well Gina did -- at least in the hands of the writers -- when she asked Paul to describe Laura and elicited what you recount. I found Paul's response, which also included how he loved every word out of Laura's mouth, especially resonant -- especially revealing as you say about how much he adores Laura.
Of course, objectively, not every word out of Laura's mouth is lovely in itself. They are to Paul because he genuinely adores her.
I don't think Laura's found this so far elsewhere -- at least not once her mother and brother were gone/out of the house. (We haven't heard much about her brother yet, have we?)
Paul and Laura's bond seems to have more than a little to do with some similarities in their experience with their parents: something Paul seems onto, as well as Laura and Gina. Paul and Laura each lost a parent, more or less, leaving them with one grieving parent who they desperately but unsuccessfully strived as children/teens to shake from their despair. The experience was toxic for each of them.
With each other, Paul and Laura succeed in pumping life in, in lifting burdens, that they were unable to accomplish with their parents.
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Posts:
1,664
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2/25/08
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(6 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 8:14 AM
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> > After reading the thread, why would any one be
> > attracted to Laura--the obvious question came
> to
> > mind, why would see want Paul?
> > He is older, married, waffles, angry,come with
> tons
> > of baggage. I have read other posters say it is
> > because he would be a man that is hard to get.
> (A man
> > like this is not much of a challenge, an easy
> target
> > if that was her motivation.)
> >
> > --
> > Tina in Florida
>
> Tina, I haven't read the other posts, but plenty of
> people feel that deep down Laura doesn't want Paul,
> or ultimately won't. That it is but "erotic
> transference" that would not survive actual
> coupling.
>
> I don't think Paul has waffled in his feelings for
> Laura, or that he's angry at her. I believe he does
> love her dearly, compassionately,and that this goes a
> long way for her, as her love/desire does for him.
>
> Could Laura do better in terms of finding someone
> closer to her age, unmarried? Of course. But I
> believe she hasn't found someone that's shown her the
> deep compassion and understanding Paul has, and he
> does have plenty going for him, too. He's handsome,
> charismatic, intense, intelligent, generally kind and
> warm towards his patients.
>
> Plus, they both appreciate and like each other in
> many ways. They have a real rapport, I think. Their
> senses of humor, playfulness are compatible.
>
> Basically, except for the context, their age
> difference, their life situations, how
> wouldn't they be a good couple? Those are
> hugh caveats, granted. But it's not so easy to find
> the rest. Laura hasn't to date, it seems. And maybe
> Paul hasn't, or if he did with Kate, it now seems
> lost with her, perhaps irretrievably so.
>
> And romance . . . Well, for me it's not about
> making decisions. The heart wants what it wants.
> When I fall for someone, it's not because they meet
> t all the points on some ideal checklist.
LOVE, it is what it is, hard to define really! Love overlooks many things, like baggage, pot bellies and age. Paul has fallen in love with Laura, when he told Gina a few episodes ago, he explained how he loves the way she laughs and enjoys talking to her. These are examples of more than a lusting after someone, this is love!
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41
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2/28/08
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(5 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 6:34 AM
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As far as Laura wanting Paul sexually...well, dont we all?! The man is beautiful! 
I think last week Paul was right in telling Laura that she interprets sex as love and so her desires could be something she is dealing with. I do however think she believes she loves him. When Paul told her he has deep feelings for her, it took her by surprise, and she was somewhat shy after that. She said "so what now". It reminded me of that butterfly feeling you get in the pit of your stomach.
I guess the ultimate test will be what happens if Paul doesnt sleep with her as he seems like he is intending to do. At least for now. He wants to show her what real affection is and how sex doesnt define love. If she doesnt get to sleep with Paul will she lose interest? Or if she does get what she wants, will she just be rid of him? There is still so much story left to tell with these two characters.
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Posts:
630
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2/26/08
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(4 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 6:23 AM
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I meant to add that I believe it is profoundly rewarding and comorting for Laura that she has been able, as she says, to pump life back into Paul.
Aside from her compassion for Paul, this was something she was not able to do with her father, or with her mother. And that has been painful for her.
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Posts:
630
Registered:
2/26/08
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(3 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 6:01 AM
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> After reading the thread, why would any one be
> attracted to Laura--the obvious question came to
> mind, why would see want Paul?
> He is older, married, waffles, angry,come with tons
> of baggage. I have read other posters say it is
> because he would be a man that is hard to get. (A man
> like this is not much of a challenge, an easy target
> if that was her motivation.)
>
> --
> Tina in Florida
Tina, I haven't read the other posts, but plenty of people feel that deep down Laura doesn't want Paul, or ultimately won't. That it is but "erotic transference" that would not survive actual coupling.
I don't think Paul has waffled in his feelings for Laura, or that he's angry at her. I believe he does love her dearly, compassionately,and that this goes a long way for her, as her love/desire does for him.
Could Laura do better in terms of finding someone closer to her age, unmarried? Of course. But I believe she hasn't found someone that's shown her the deep compassion and understanding Paul has, and he does have plenty going for him, too. He's handsome, charismatic, intense, intelligent, generally kind and warm towards his patients.
Plus, they both appreciate and like each other in many ways. They have a real rapport, I think. Their senses of humor, playfulness are compatible.
Basically, except for the context, their age difference, their life situations, how wouldn't they be a good couple? Those are hugh caveats, granted. But it's not so easy to find the rest. Laura hasn't to date, it seems. And maybe Paul hasn't, or if he did with Kate, it now seems lost with her, perhaps irretrievably so.
And romance . . . Well, for me it's not about making decisions. The heart wants what it wants. When I fall for someone, it's not because they meet all the points on some ideal checklist.
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7
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8/22/05
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(2 of 26)
Re: Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 5:35 AM
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First as to the nature of the transference relationship itself: If two people are repeatedly alone together some sort of emotional bond will develop between them (especialy in a therapuetic setting). Even though they may be strangers engaged in relatively neutral occupations, not directed by one or the other for or against the other one. Its not that Laura wants Paul, its what Paul represents, what Laura desperately wants in a partner, relationship, what she perceives to be love.
Michael J. Alicea, MS, MSW
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Posts:
3
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2/26/08
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(1 of 26)
Why would Laura want Paul?
Mar 6, 2008 5:15 AM
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After reading the thread, why would any one be attracted to Laura--the obvious question came to mind, why would see want Paul?
He is older, married, waffles, angry,come with tons of baggage. I have read other posters say it is because he would be a man that is hard to get. (A man like this is not much of a challenge, an easy target if that was her motivation.)
--
Tina in Florida
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